"Vampire Diaries" > "Twilight"

Speaking of the New Moon movie I reviewed last week, I've been thinking a lot lately about this whole vampire craze. Now, I haven't read ANY of the Twilight, Vampire Diaries, or Sookie Stackhouse books. None. Not a single one. It's not really my thing. I'm a bigger fan of general fiction, typically by Jewish authors--go figure. But, I've seen everything that's been produced on these series. I've suffered through the Twilight movies, begrudgingly watched True Blood for a couple of episodes before I got REALLLLLLLLY into it--hello, Eric, nice to meet you. And when Vampire Diaries debuted on the CeeDub, I rolled my eyes profusefuly. However, after reading about it being the next Gossip Girl of guilty pleasures, I watched an episode on my computer before investing my DVR space on it. Needless to say, I now watch it every week, and, I may not make fans with this statement, but Vampire Diaries is SO much better than Twilight, and here's why....

I made it through a screening of "New Moon" and didn't get mauled by 'tweens

Seriously, people go nuts for this shit? And I'm not just talking about 'tweens because I think their moms may be worse. There was one mom, obviously trying to pretend she hadn't hit 40 yet, decked out in a New Moon t-shirt that kept asking those around her whose "team" they were on. She (and her not-quite out of the closet son) were rooting for Jacob. Obviously because he was shirtless for most of the film and likes to wear cutoff jean shorts (in the rain. during winter. in the Northwest. Go figure.) So...whatever. I'm either too old to get it or too young to be aroused by jailbait. I mean, fine, his muscles are impressive, but I can't get behind all of this. I'm sorry; I'll take Eric in True Blood any day. I mean, c'mon, check out this photo! (Minus the lack of body hair, of course; that's just a little weird.)

To check out my full review, head over to TheMoviePress.com.

I have a love/hate relationship with "Glee"

Okay, so I love musicals (well, for the most part; Rent can suck my nuts). They are fun and cheesy and emotional and you have to be really talented. So, when Glee was announced last spring on Fox's schedule, I was intrigued, excited even. I knew it had the possibility to help catapult musicals out of the kitschy sphere and into mainstream America. So, the pilot aired, and I thought it was cute, but I wasn't blown away (even with the "Don't Stop Believin'" cover). Well, now nine episodes later, and I've got some definite mixed emotions about the show. I sorta love it on some levels, and I definitely hate it on others.

Read more about my conundrum.

I feel like death

Apparently too much karaoke, drinking, and strip club action will make you feel poopy. I had a great weekend, though, and Greg had a fantastic birthday due to his buddies coming into town. Also, he got to rain dollar bills y'all all over a stripper, which made his face light up quite brightly. But, now we must both suffer the consequences of too much fun and cough up horrible things... :(

Is this possibly the worst season of SYTYCD?

Maybe I'm asking myself this question too early into the actual performances because last season I was asking myself the same thing around this time, only to eat my words by the end and go, "Okay, fine, this season didn't suck THAT hard." I was even excited at the prospect of having two SYTYCD seasons so closely back to back.

Man, was I naive.

Sausage + beer + Germans = Awesome.

It's no secret that I love meat. Because I loved animals so much as a child, I tried very hard to be a vegetarian for a while, but it failed spectacularly. Ever since I have been a meat aficionado, diving into meaty delights at every chance I get. So, of course, when the Wurstfest, the 10-day salute to saugsage, rolled into New Braunfels this year, I knew I HAD to go. I've been trying to drag someone with me for the past four years, and finally I had a willing participant in Greg, who I think I finally converted to the dark side of meaty hedonism.

If I were a rich man...I would own these

Online shopping is going to be the death of me.

I really love these wellies. It's been so rainy here lately, and I hate when the bottom of my pants get soaked--it takes FOR-EV-ER to dry--that I've really been dying for a pair of rain boots. These Hunter boots might be a smidge too haute couture for the corportate life, but a girl can still ogle profusely. Okay, plus they're like 150 British pounds, so no way will these make their way into my closet. Siigh.

Bored at work=online shopping

I know, I know--I'm posting a shit ton today. Work is a smidge slow today. Anyhoo, since Gmail is blocked on my network (for shame!), and I have to fill my time occassionally, I guiltily shop for clothes I can't afford and quickly switch to working for reals when a cubicle neighbor walks by en route to the printer. Sitting in front of printer is no bueno.

My new obsession is this Netflix-eque site called Rate the Runway, which allows you to rent a fabulous dress for $50-200. This may sound expensive, considering I could plop down 50 bucks and walk away with two Forever 21 dresses to have until they fall apart (roughly two months...). But, I was scanning through their selection, and I could TOTALLY see myself doing this for, say, my birthday or New Year's Eve, when you really NEED an incredibly swank dress, especially when $50 can get you a $400 dress for the night. Even better--they send you two sizes, so that you know you'll get the right fit.

Right now I'm coveting these:

By Lela Rose

Retails for $1,395

(gorgeous color)

By Robert Rodriguez Collection

Retails for $650

By Badgley Mischka

Retails for $530

(love the origami effect!)

By Herve Leger

Retails for $1,350

(okay, fine, I would look like a sausage in this one with my big ol' booty, but a girl can dream, non?)

By Yigal Azrouel

Retails for $915

(metallics are so hot right now, and this mini Grecian dress is gorge)

By Catherine Maladrino

Retails for $495

(I LOVE a jumpsuit when they aren't smutty. I wonder if I'm too short to rock one?)

Stuff that grosses me out: Robert Pattinson craze

Sorry, Twilight fans, he's greasy and not attractive, and I find it super disturbing that there is a documentary devoted to him called Robsessed, which came out today.

Billed as “Inside the life of Robert Pattinson," according to a rep for the release, the documentary features people Pattinson’s worked with talking about his life, as well as “industry commentators” and “a couple of diehard fans.” Apparently this is coupled with some early modeling shots of him in boxer shorts. Cue girlish screams!

You can read more about the "documentary" at EW, as well as see some clips--you know, if that's you're thing. No judgement!

Period piece not done to perfection: The Young Victoria

In addition to my day job, I also moonlight as a film reviewer for TheMoviePress. You should check it out! Today, I posted my review on The Young Victoria, which follows the beginnings of Queen Victoria in her acension to the throne and her love affair with Prince Albert.

What a great season for "Mad Men," no?

I've heard a lot of complaints about Mad Men being too focused on character development and not enough on plotlines, which is something I have agreed with on occassion. How am I supposed to know what every deep, meaningful stare is supposed to imply? But, I must say that this season of Mad Men rocked my world. Don't worry, I will refrain from spoiling.

Rant of the Week: Serena's clothing on "Gossip Girl"

I'm not gonna lie; Gossip Girl is one of my (okay, many) TV guilty pleasures. Sure, it's cheesy and immature and not very plausible most of the time, but I love watching it for some Blair and Chuck feistiness. Plus, the fashion is super swoon-worthy.

However, that being said, I cannot stand Serena's (Blake Lively) wardrobe. Ever since season two, they started dressing her in all of these suuuuuper low cut outfits. It's like the girl sprouted boobs overnight in my mind (and she very well may have). And, as much as I love boobs as the next person, I just can't condone that much cleavage on a daily basis.

What is it, 2003?

Yes, fine, I did it. I'm officially a blogging nerd. I've resisted these things for soooo long because I find blogs to be either a. self-indulgent (see "i'm so lonely I could die" posts or "what a fabulous party! what you can't get in? too bad!" blogs) or b. boring as shit. I don't find myself to be that interesting, let alone most people who blog. Hence why I have never joined the blogosphere.

So, why the sudden change of heart? Well, I'm technically a writer, you see, and people have bugged me for years about not having a blog. Before the whole blogging craze took off people nagged me about not keeping a journal: "A writer who doesn't have a journal?! Blasphemy," they would say. Pish posh. I kept a diary for about 9 months when I was 10 years old. I would write in it like it was going to be kept in a time capsule, and my great-great granddaughter would find it years later, so mostly it would say stuff like "Dear whoever reads this after I am long dead, today I chased this boy around. And then I came home and kissed my Jordan Knight NKOTB pillowcase. The end." Obviously, I stopped writing in it because I ran out of boys to torment, and I just never picked it back up.

Back to the question at hand--why now? The truth is that I'm getting stupider. No joke. I used to work for a newspaper until I lost my job last December, and ever since I have not had a full time writing gig. Sure, I've had odd and end jobs and some freelancing opps, but day-to-day writing? Negative. My old journalism professor kept giving me shit for not writing a book, or at least a stupid blog. So here goes. Frankly, I'm just trying to flex my writing muscles and keep myself from getting even dumber. Plus, I think I have a couple of fairly interesting things to say. Okay, not really, but I DO have a fat cat (that's him in the photo) I will write about, and he's incredibly interesting.

There you have it. I'll try to make this blog as painless as possible, and, honestly I feel like this is so late in the blogging game that it's just sad and lame now, but whatever. Mostly, I'm just gonna post things I find interesting, i.e. food, fashion, movies, pop culture, fat cats, and whatever else the Internet throws my way.

I promise never to write a "woe is me" post. Those are icky.